The Wizard of Odd
by SupremeBoredom
Summary: Wizard of Oz parody. Nuff said. I will allow flames for this story. LAST CHAPTER IS UP! Story is over! :
1. Prologue or Introduction WHATEVER!

Author's Note: I'm actually going to allow flames this time. But if you peeps don't like my stories, then why you reading them? CRAZY PEOPLE! TEEHEE! Imma get started with the story now. :D

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**The wizard of odd.**

**Prologue****. Or introduction. WHATEVER!**

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My name is Stan Marsh. I live in South Park, Colorado. Even though the parents who live here are complete morons and the things that happen here are just not normal, I like this town. I have 3 friends. One of them is really poor, always hides behind his orange parka, and is the perv of our group. His name is Kenny. Another one is not really my friend, but we hang out. He is a sadistic asshole who manipulates people and blackmails them so he can get what he wants. He is a fatass, his name is Cartman. And then there's my best friend Kyle. He is Jewish, a daywalker (at least that's what Cartman says he is) he's really smart, and he never follows any fads that happen.

I live with my sister Shelly, who beats me and calls me a turd, my mom, who is probably the most level headed person in our family, my dad, who is incredibly stupid, and my grandpa, who is always trying to kill himself. I have a dog named Sparky. Sure he's gay, but he's my dog and I love him.

Anyways, today I went out to walk Sparky. Although that old lady named Mrs. Broflovski came by me on her bike. (A/N: In this parody, Kyle is not related to his mom. It'll be a little better if they weren't)

"Why hellooooo Stanley. Walking your dog?" She asked in her really annoying voice.

"Um, yeah. It's Tuesday. I always walk Sparky on Tuesday." I replied.

"Oh that's right! But where's his leash?"

"He's well trained Mrs. Broflovski. He doesn't need one."

"Is that right? Well let's see just how trained he really is!" Then she picks up Sparky and places him in a basket on her bike.

"Later Stanley!" Then she just rides off.

"SPARKY!" I yell. I began chasing after her, but that woman rides her bike really fast.

I hate that old woman! She finds out the things that make us happy, then she takes it away from us. And she does it for her own personal amusement.

Angered, I walk over to Kyle's house. Going over there helps me calm down.

"Hey Stan!" Kyle is already at his front porch.

"HI!" I grumbled.

"What's wrong?"

"Mrs. Broflovski stole my dog."

"Why don't you go ask Chef for help." (A/N: In this parody, just pretend that Chef never died.)

"Okay." And so I walk to Chef's house for some help.

I knocked on the door when I finally got there.

"Hello there children!" He greeted as he answered the door.

"Hey chef"

"How's it going?"

"Bad."

"Why bad?"

"Chef, Mrs. Broflovski stole my dog."

"Oh, is this your dog?" He went into his house and came back with Sparky.

"SPARKY!" I exclaimed, then I grabbed my dog. "Where's you find him?"

"He came to my door." Chef replied.

"Thanks chef!"

"You should probably be going home. There's going to be a tornado coming!"

A tornado? Of all the screwed up things that happen in South Park, never once has there been a tornado. We live in Colorado! It's all mountainous here. How is a tornado coming? Oh well, it's always best to take Chef's advice. So I start heading towards my house.

When I got there, sure enough everyone was freaking out trying to prepare for the tornado.

"STAN!" My dad yelled.

"What?"

"GO GET WATER FROM THE STORE!"

"But dad! A tornado is coming, it's too dangerous."

"GO!"

I sighed. There is no point in arguing with stupid people. I start heading towards the store.

Halfway there, I see this weird spiral thing spinning in a distance. It's the tornado. So I run home.

Everyone in my house is already packed into the safest place in the house. And won't let me in. So, I went into my room.

I sat on my bed. Sparky laying next to me. Sparky whined.

"It's okay Spark." I assure him. "It might not even come by here."

But I was wrong. 10 minutes later the tornado came by my house breaking my window. The shards of glass hit me in the back of my head and I passed out.

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Author's Note: You probably weren't very familiar with the beginning of the story. But in the next chapter, you will begin to recognize the story. HEHEHEHE!


	2. Chapter 1: Where the fuck am I?

Author's Note: This is where things might start seeming familiar to most of you.

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**The Wizard of Odd.**

**Chapter 1: Where the fuck am I?**

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I woke up in my room. It was a mess! I look out the window to see the damage. But I see is just the center of the tornado! I got sucked in! I notice other houses got sucked in too. Then a cat came by, then an old guy in a bathtub, then Mrs. Broflovski on her bike. She looked at me with evil eyes and turned into a witch on a broom and started laughing maniacally.

I walk away from the window. I get back on my bed and start hugging Sparky.

Then suddenly, THUD! We were no longer in the tornado. So me and Sparky walk outside.

It was weird. We were in some weird place that was really colorful. I could hear whispering in the bushes.

"Um, hello? Can anyone tell where the fuck I am?" I ask.

No one answered they kept whispering to each other.

"HELLO?" I screamed.

Still whispers.

Suddenly a big pink bubble comes from the sky and lands right in front of me. It pops and reveals a girl with black hair and a big pink dress.

"It's okay to come out now munchkins." She yelled to the people in the bushes.

A lot of little people come out from the bushes. They looked scared of me.

"Why hello there." Greets the girl from the pink bubble. "My name is Wendy."

"I'm Stan."

"Well, thank you Stan you have freed us from the Wicked Witch of the West."

"I did?"

She nods and points to my house. There is someone under it. But 5 seconds later the person's legs curled up to the knees and then the person turned to dust.

I cringed. The leg curling was freaky!

"Now Stan, are you a good witch or a bad witch?" Asked Wendy.

"Um, I'm not a witch." I replied.

"Yes you are. If you aren't a witch then how are you wearing the Wicked Witch of the West's ruby slippers?" She asked.

I looked down to see me wearing ruby slippers instead of boots.

"Um, I don't know. I'm taking these off."

"DON'T!"

"Why?"

She looked around. "You'll need them later on."

"O-k. Where am I?"

"Why you're in the great land of lollipops!" She replied happily.

"Um, cool. How do I get to South Park, Colorado?" I asked.

"Oh, you'll need to speak with the Wizard. He lives in the Emerald Palace." Said Wendy.

"How do I get there?"

"Oh you need to follow the rainbow road."

"Where's that?"

Suddenly Wendy and the little people she called 'Munchkins' broke out in song and dance leading me to this road that was multi-colored.

"Thanks, but could you mind not singing?" I asked.

"YES PLEASE IT'S REALLY ANNOYING!" Called an unfamiliar voice.

Everyone turned towards the voice and gasped. It belonged to a woman with a black robe who was on a broom. She kinda looked like, Mrs. Broflovski?

"I am the Wicked Witch of the North. Which one of you twerps killed my sister?"

The Munchkins all pointed at me.

"How dare you! Nobody kills my sister and gets away with it! I will have my revenge!" Then she disappears in black smoke.

"It's okay Stan, I'll keep you safe." Said Wendy. "Just remember to keep those ruby slippers on." Then she forms back into a pink bubble and disappears.

This place is so weird. I decide to just walk to this 'Emerald Palace' so I can get home as soon as possible.

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Author's Note: IDK When next chap will be out. But whateves.


	3. Chapter 2: The Scarecrow

Author's Note: Thanks for the reviews peeps! MORE HUGS AND COOKIES!

kylekennypiptweek: Love your name! Thanks for your review! Here's a hug and a plate of cookies.

IChangedMyNameAgain: What'd you change your name to? And yeah, Stan has to wear ruby slippers! HUGS AND COOKIES!

TweekingOut: LOVE YOUR NAME! I love Tweek too, but no... I already have all the characters figured out before I wrote this. But here's a hug and a plate of cookies!

CreekGrrl: REVIEW FROM ONE OF MY FAVES! You're right Stan is Dorothy. But that's cause Dorothy has Toto, and Stan has Sparky. I'm not gonna use any people from Craig's group. I would, but I already got all my characters figured out. HUGS AND COOKIES!

brittishlikepip: The Munchkins are scared of the witch. Stupid Wicked Bitch of the North. Oops, I meant witch! HUGS AND COOKIES!

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**The Wizard of Odd.**

**Chapter 2: The Scarecrow. **

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I've been walking for half an hour now! How far away is the Emerald Palace? I hope I get there soon, this whole place is fucked up.

"SHOO YOU STUPID CROWS!" I heard a voice yell from a nearby corn field.

Curiosity struck me so I went into the field and saw a familiar looking head in the distance. It looked kinda like, Kyle?

"KYLE?" I shout.

The figure that looked like Kyle flinched and turned around.

"My name isn't Kyle. I am the Scarecrow." He replied. Creepy, he looked like a scarecrow version of Kyle.

"Um, Okay. Do you know how far the Emerald Palace is?" I ask "Scarecrow".

"Yeah, It's rather far from here. Why?"

"I'm asking some wizard if he can get me home."

"Ah, You seeing the wizard? Mind if I come with? I want to see him too." The Scarecrow had hopeful eyes.

"Yeah, sure. Why do you need to see him?"

"Well, I don't have a brain."

"Um, If you don't have a brain, how are you moving, talking, LIVING?"

He sighed. "I'm nothing but a scarecrow."

"Moving? Talking? Living?" This place is just weird.

"Yeah, I don't know how. Just the way it is."

"Well, I don't know if getting a brain will do anything. The hay needles inside of you would just poke holes in it."

"OH YOU MUST UNDERSTAND!" He shouted.

"Okay, Explain it to me." I respond showing some sympathy.

"Well, I've got all this knowledge, enough to drive a man insane. But how will I ever get in college, if I don't have a brain?" He sang.

"PLEASE NO SINGING! Just come with me!" I shouted going back to the rainbow path.

"Okay!" He chased after me.

We walked for about 5 minutes until he links arms with me and starts skipping. "We're off to see the wizard! The wonderful Wizard of-"

I push him to the ground. "I said no singing! And please, no skipping either!"

"You're no fun!" He pouted.

"Because you're annoying!"

The Scarecrow got back to his feet. "Alright I'll stop skipping and singing."

"Good, now come on, the sooner we get there, the better!"

I was really starting to get annoyed with this place.

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Author's Note: So far we know Stan is Dorothy, Sparky is Toto, Wendy is Glenda the good witch, Shelia Broflovski is the Wicked Witch of the North, and Kyle is the Scarecrow. Any guesses for who the Tin Man is?

(P.S. I'm sorry to those who want them part of the story, but nobody from Craig's group will be in this. Sorry for the inconvenience.)

(P.P.S. All my reviewers get hugs and cookies! :D )


	4. Chapter 3: The Tin Man

Author's Note: MORE REVIEWS! I NEED MORE COOKIE DOUGH!

YeMerryHippogriffs: GRR! CURSE YOU PHINEAS AND FERB! And no. Cartman's not the Tin Man. HUGS AND COOKIES!

kylekennypiptweek: YEAH! Your first guess was right! :D HUGS AND COOKIES!

brittishlikepip: Yeah! It's Kenny. Cartman will be a coward! HUGS AND COOKIES!

TweekingOut: That's right, Imma ninja! YAY! HUGS AND COOKIES!

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**The wizard of odd.**

**Chapter 3: The Tin Man.**

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At first I thought the Scarecrow was annoying with all the skipping and singing, but once I actually talked to him he seemed pretty cool. He told lots of jokes, told me about "Them damn crows", and some things about where I am.

"Yeah, that Wicked Witch is really annoying. She's the one who keeps sending them damn crows!" Says the Scarecrow.

"I never knew witchcraft even existed." I answered.

"Around here it does. Weird stuff happens here all the time."

"Yeah, just like where I'm from." From what Scarecrow has told me, this place is a lot like South Park. And he's a lot like Kyle. It's strange.

"So where is South Park anyway?" he asks.

"Colorado." I answer.

"Where's Colorado?"

"America."

"Where's America?"

"North America."

"Where's that?"

"Western Hemisphere."

"Where's that?"

"The west side of Earth?"

"Where's Earth?"

I give him a strange look. "Um, We're on Earth. Right?"

Before he could answer we heard muffled screams in the woods.

"Come on Stan! Someone's in trouble!" Yelled Scarecrow as he ran into the woods.

I chase after him, the screams getting louder and louder as we got closer. Finally, we find the screams belong to someone who is in a parka made out of tin. Let me guess, this was this place's version of Kenny, right?

"MMMMM! MMM!" The tin parka boy screamed.

I pull his hood down. Sure enough, it looks exactly like Kenny, except he's made of tin.

"HELP ME!" The tin Kenny shouted. "I can't move! There's magazines in my coat! Pull one out and show me a page of it!"

Scarecrow reaches into the tin parka and pulls out a magazine and shows the tin person a random page.

The tin Kenny, (who was completely paralyzed when me and scarecrow came over) began to move.

"THANK YOU!" He shouted giving us a hug.

I looked at the magazine Scarecrow showed him.

"DON'T LOOK AT THAT!" The tin Kenny shouted. "Those are mine, and you probably won't like it." He answered awkwardly shoving the magazine back into his parka.

"Why?" I asked.

"Because..." He answered. "Well, um..."

"It's okay Kenny, you can tell me anything."

The tin Kenny gave me a weird look. "My name isn't Kenny. It's Tin Man."

"Really? Oh, sorry."

"Um, yeah."

"Well, Stan and I were just off to go see the Wizard. You wanna come along?" Asked Scarecrow.

'Tin Man' grinned. "Yeah! I've always wanted a heart."

"You don't have a heart?" I asked.

"Mm hmm. What I would give to have something warm inside me. Something that beats when I'm happy. Something to make me more, human." The Tin Man sighed and put the hood of his parka back on.

"You're not gonna start singing are you?" I asked.

"No. Not in the mood." The Tin Man replied.

"Oh, GOOD!"

"Let's just go."

"Yeah, we need to get the Emerald Palace as soon as we can!" Scarecrow agreed.

And so we began our long journey to the Emerald Palace.

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Author's Note: Another chapter down. And IDK how many more to go. Anyone guess what happens next? If you pay attention to the movie you know the answer. :D

Bye for now! Imma go eat cookies and tell my friend Tori to quit bitching at me! :D


	5. Chapter 4: The Apple Trees

Author's Note: More reviews? WOW! You peeps are what keep happy with my writing. That's why I give you all hugs and cookies! :D

IChangedMyNameAgain: YAY! More cookie dough! HEHEHEHE. HUGS AND COOKIES!

kylekennypiptweek: Yep, Kenny is a perv after all. They are on Earth. I just wanted the conversation to be longer. HUGS AND COOKIES!

RESPECTMYATHORITAH: I LOVE YOUR NAME! And thanks! HUGS AND COOKIES!

YeMerryHippogriffs: Yep. Cartman's the lion! HEHEHEHE. HUGS AND COOKIES!

Creek Grrl: Butters would make an awesome Cowardly Lion. He's all shy and lets people push him around. But I was going to make it Cartman because it would be funny that Cartman has all these evil plans, but don't have the courage to do them. But Butters would be cool. HUGS AND COOKIES!

brittishlikepip: You think so? Some peeps don't like the singing. HUGS AND COOKIES!

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**The Wizard of Odd.**

**Chapter 4: The apple trees.**

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Me, Scarecrow and Tin Man seem to be getting along pretty well. Scarecrow and Tin Man remind me so much of Kyle and Kenny. It's really creepy.

"You guys, I'm starting to get hungry." Said Tin Man.

My stomach rumbled. "Me too."

"There's some apple trees up ahead. How about you two get an apple?" Scarecrow suggested.

"Okay."

I was really hungry. I haven't ate anything since I got here. And the last thing I ate was breakfast from back when I was in South Park. Apparently Tin Man hasn't ate anything in 5 days. Poor guy.

After about five minutes of walking I ask Scarecrow, "About how far are these apple trees?"

"Not much farther, we just gotta keep moving." He replied.

"It better not be that far. I'm starving." said Tin Man.

Finally, we see a big trail of apple trees.

"Wow dude! There's like a shitload of apples here!" Yells Tin Man running to the trees.

I go running as well. Then I picked a random apple from a tree.

"OW!" Something shouted.

"Um, hello? Is anyone there?" I yell.

"Yes. There's trees all around you." The voice responded.

"What?" I asked.

Suddenly the tree I picked the apple from turned around and faced me. It had a face! Creepy...

"Trees are living things too, ya know." It shouted. "We don't go around plucking hairs of your head, so why you go around plucking apples off our branches?"

"Uh..." I wasn't sure how to respond.

"Hmph just as I thought." The tree replied. "At least say you're sorry."

"I'm sorry. I had no idea!"

"You had no idea? Haven't you any heart kid?" The tree shouted.

"Of course I do! It's just, I'm not used to talking trees."

The tree sighed. "Of course you don't."

"OW!" Shouted a voice in the distance.

"Are there others with you?" The tree asked.

"Yeah."

"DON'T YOU KIDS KNOW ANYTHING? YOU'RE ALL A BUNCH OF HEARTLESS BASTARDS!" The tree smacked the apple out of my hand. "YOU PEOPLE ARE ALL ALIKE! SELFISH! SELFISH, SELFISH, SELFISH! TREES, ATTACK THE CHILDREN!"

Then trees began picking apples and pelting me with them. I started running from the trees. Then I heard barking behind me. It was Sparky! He was being pelted with apples as well. I ran to Sparky, picked him up, then ran straight away from the trail of apple trees.

"Dude, what the fuck is with those trees?" Tin Man asked when I finally got out of the trail of apple trees. It looks as if Tin Man and Scarecrow got pelted as well.

"One of them told me we were selfish." I replied.

"More like they were selfish! I didn't even get one apple!"

Me and Scarecrow both sighed.

"Tin Man, that was a selfish remark right there." Scarecrow said.

"Well I guess it's how I am when I'm hungry."

"Look, we're almost there. Let's just keep walking." Scarecrow replied.

And so we continue our journey to the Emerald Palace. But I'm still hungry.

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Author's Note: HEHEHE! You peeps forgot that the apple tree part happened before the Cowardly Lion! XD Cowardly Lion will be in the next chapter, which i will start writing after I'm done with this note.

This chapter was supposed to be up yesterday, but we did some back to school shopping. Then when I got home, I got to play the best video game ever! We bought it while we were out yesterday! Anyone know what it is? Sonic Adventure. It is originally a Dreamcast game, but they remade it for Xbox. Anyone ever played it? Don't care for the missions, it's the Chao garden! You know, where you raised Chaos and stuff. I'm gonna work on the next chapter now.


	6. Chapter 5: The Cowardly Lion

Author's Note: REVIEW TIME!

kylekennypiptweek: THANKS! And yes I could use some cookie dough. HUGS AND COOKIES!

brittishlikepip: Okay, I gues I could add more in, but not that much since some peeps don't like it. HUGS AND COOKIES!

IChangedMyNameAgain: Yep, Them damn trees, just like them damn crows. Just know the world is full of assholes. HEHEHEE! HUGS AND COOKIES!

TweekingOut: YAY! Yeah, I know, I just felt like using the other peeps. And that would mean Token would be Dorothy? XD HUGS AND COOKIES!

Creek Grrl: :D YAY! And actually, I haven't really decided who the Wizard would be. Hmmmmmmmm... HUGS AND COOKIES!

Disclaimer: (I keep forgetting to put this) I don't own South Park or the Wizard of Oz. Trey Parker and Matt Stone own South Park, and I have no idea who own the Wizard of Oz.

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**The Wizard of Odd.**

**Chapter 5: The Cowardly Lion.**

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Eventually, Tin Man and I found some fruits from trees that weren't evil. Scarecrow was being unusually quiet.

"Hey, Scarecrow?" I asked.

He flinched. "What? Oh sorry."

"You okay?"

"I'm fine. Just deep in thought."

"Okay."

The silence is really awkward. We're just walking and not saying a word to each other. The only sounds you actually hear is Sparky's occasional barking and Tin Man eating.

Then suddenly, Sparky runs off into the woods barking repeatedly.

"Come on guys! We gotta get Sparky!" I yell running into the woods after Sparky. Tin Man and Scarecrow follow.

Damn that dog runs fast! I was just barely able to see him when suddenly, I see Sparky get trampled to the ground by a lion. A fat lion.

"Yes I got you!" The lion exclaimed.

"HEY! LEAVE MY DOG ALONE!" I yell.

The lion turned to me and laughed. Only holding Sparky tighter.

The lion, he looks like... Cartman?

"Cartman?" I asked. Even though I know it's not him. It's just this place's version of him.

"The name is not Cartman. It's the Great, Super Awesome, and Sexy Lion!" He replied.

"Yeah... Um, Great Lion or whatever, can I please have my dog back?" I asked.

"No. This dog heah is mine! I found him, so he's mine!" He yelled.

Finally Scarecrow and Tin Man caught up to me.

"Are... these... your friends?" He asked timidly.

"Yeah." I replied.

"Oh..." He released Sparky. "Please, don't hurt me I-I'm sorry."

We all looked confused.

"Um, dude. I thought you were like the Great, Super Awesome and Sexy Lion or something." I say.

"The only thing 'Great' about him is his weight." Said Tin Man. Me and Scarecrow laughed.

"EY! You're just jealous of how kewl I am!" Said the Lion.

"Dude. You're not cool." Said Scarecrow.

"Yes I am! You guys I'm seriously!" The Lion shouted.

The way he talks reminds me so much of Cartman.

"So why did you cowar when you seen three people instead of one?" Asked Scarecrow.

The lion sighed. "Okay, so I'm not the Great, Super Awesome and Sexy Lion. I'm actually the Cowardly Lion. You know why? Because I'm a fucking coward! I have so many evil plans I can do. But I'm too scared to do anything!"

"Oh, um really?" I ask.

"Yeah. I'm a stupid coward."

"Well we're going to see the Wizard. Maybe you can ask him for some courage." Said Scarecrow.

"Really?" Asked the Cowardly Lion.

"Sure. Now come on! We have to get going." We made our way out of the woods and continued our journey to the Emerald Palace.

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Author's Note: YAY! Now I'm not sure exactly what happens next. But I'll remember eventually. Who should the Wizard be? That's the only character I'm not sure about.

We have open houses today. We go back to school on Wednesday. Please wish me luck that I don't get the advanced classes like I'm supposed to. None of my friends will be in them and the kids who usually get those classes are assholes. (Not that any of you advance class people out there are, but the advance peeps in my school) Well no more boring rambles over nothing. BYE!


	7. Chapter 6: WWN's Broomstick

Author's Note: REVIEW TIME!

kylekennypiptweek: Wow! You're review made me explode with happiness. :D Yes, I could use some more cookie dough. HUGS AND COOKIES!

brittishlikepip: Yep. But that's because he's such a coward. HEHEHE! HUGS AND COOKIES!

Creek Grrl: I'll be in 7th. Isn't that the grade when the other girls will start being bitches to others? Or is that 8th grade? And don't worry about 9th grade. I know you're finally going into High School and your nervous, but my sis was the same way, and she was fine once she got with all her friends. And thanks. It turns out I got two teachers I hated that I had last year. They moved up to 7th grade from 6th grade or something. HUGS AND COOKIES!

MustacheCupcake: LOVE YOUR NAME! And thanks! HUGS AND COOKIES!

Disclaimer: I don't own South Park or the Wizard of Oz. Trey Parker and Matt Stone own South Park, and I have no idea who own the Wizard of Oz.

* * *

**The Wizard of Odd.**

**Chapter 6: The Wicked Witch of the North's Broomstick.**

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It was hilarious. Cowardly Lion was afraid to rip on us. He almost called me a "stupid hippie" but apologized immediately.

"And anyways. She told me, 'you're so cute. I hope we stay together for a long time.' And I just told her 'Um, I don't think this would work out.' Then she called me a jerk and ran out crying. Not like I really cared anyway." Tin Man was telling us a bunch of stories about chicks. Kenny did the same thing.

"Tin Man, I'm seriously. Shut up! No one cares about your stupid stories." Said an annoyed Cowardly Lion.

"Hey, I think your courage is getting a little better." Said Scarecrow.

"No. That took all the bravery I had to say that. I-I'm sorry Tin Man."

A sudden green light flashes in my eyes. I look to see where it was coming from. It was a big green palace far off in the distance.

"Guys is that... the Emerald Palace?" I ask pointing to the green palace.

"Yeah." Answered Scarecrow.

"What? We're finally here?" Exclaimed Tin Man.

"Yeah!" I answer. "We're finally here! Come on guys!" I ran towards the Emerald Palace. This was it! We finally found it! I finally get to go home!

Scarecrow, Tin Man and Cowardly Lion follow me. All four of us running like we found an exit to a cave we got trapped in or something.

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"Yes you fools better run." Said the Wicked Witch of the North as she watched the four boys run towards the palace on a crystal ball. "Now I know where you are. BUTTERS HAND ME MY BROOM STICK! Now's the time for my revenge."

"Well, what are ya g-gonna do to them poor fellas?" Butters asked handing the witch her broom.

"Then plan is simple deary. But I don't trust you enough to go blabbing all my horrible plans."

"Please? I won't tell nobody! I swear on it."

"Okay. Well. First I disguise my self as a poor woman who seeks help from the Wizard. Then, I offer the Wizard a deal." The Wicked Witch smirked.

"Well uh, What kind of deal?"

"Blackmail stupid!"

"Isn't blackmail bad?"

The Wicked Witch slapped Butters. "YES YOU IDIOT!"

"I-I'm sorry." He apologized.

"Anyway, we blackmail the Wizard into bringing the boys here." The Witch began laughing.

Butters felt scared. And awkwardly began laughing with her.

The witch stopped.

"Now. I'm off you insufferable fool." The Wicked Witch got on her broom and flew off.

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"Finally. We're at the Emerald Palace!" Cowardly Lion exclaimed.

I knock on the door. It had 3 circles on it. The circle in the middle opened revealing a tiny man.

"Hello. Welcome to the Emerald Palace. The Wizard is not seeing any clients today. So you wasted your time coming here. Sorry for the inconvenience, please come back tomorrow." Said the man.

"What? Come back tomorrow? But I need to be home now!" I whine.

"You can come back tomorrow." The man said again.

"And I need a brain." Said Scarecrow.

"Tomorrow. Yo can have one."

"I need a heart." Said tin Man.

"Tomorrow."

"And I need my courage!" Said the Cowardly Lion beginning to tear up.

"Look. Just come back tomorrow. And you'll get what you want from the Wizard!" The man tried to explain. This just made Cowardly Lion start sobbing.

"I... NEED MAH COURAGE!" The Cowardly Lion began sobbing harder.

This somehow made the man feel sorry for him. "Okay. You four can come in. But please don't be mad if he doesn't grant your wishes."

"Thank you sir!" I say.

The big door of the Emerald Palace opened. It was full of people.

"The Wizard is in the last room on the left." The man told us.

"Great, just what we need. Another long walk." Complained Tin Man.

"It's okay. It's not that long of a walk." Said Scarecrow.

It was. It took us 10 minutes to finally get to the Wizard's room.

"See Scarecrow, it was a long walk!"

"Guys be quiet." I whisper. "You don't want to annoy the Wizard."

We open the door and Cowardly Lion starts running away. He's stopped by me and Scarecrow.

"Dude what are you doing?" I ask.

"I-I'm too scare t-to go in." He answered.

"Why?"

"I d-don't know if I'm ready."

"Come on dude. The Wizard will give you your courage."

"Okay."

We walk into the room which has the Wizard in it.

"Who dares seek the Great Wizard in his day where he can finally get some rest?" Asked a gigantic head being held up by big, green emeralds.

I step forward. "My name is Stan. I'm sorry to disturb you, but I need to get back home to South Park."

"Stanley? You are Stanley?" The Wizard questioned.

"Um, yeah."

"Why hello Stanley. I see you brought your little friends with you too!" The Wizard looked angry and flames were shooting out of the emeralds.

"You, Scarecrow or whatever. You want a brain is that correct?" He asked Scarecrow.

"Yes sir." Scarecrow replied.

"And you, Tin Man. You want a heart?"

"Yeah." Tin Man Answered.

"And you, Cowardly Lion. You want some courage?"

Instead of answering Cowardly Lion screamed, turned around and ran. But the exit was blocked off by flames.

"I take that as a yes." Said the Wizard.

"Will you give us what we want?" I ask.

"Yes. But first, you gotta do me a favor."

The Wizard's voice. It sounded awfully familiar. I couldn't tell what his face looked like because of the flames. He sounded like Mr. Garrison?

"Okay." I answer.

"Go to the Wicked Witch of the North's Castle. Retrieve to me her broomstick. If that is done, then I'll grant your wishes."

I look at my three friends nervously. Scarecrow and Tin Man nod, but Cowardly Lion won't even look at anything.

"Okay. We'll get you the Wicked Witch of the North's broomstick."

"Perfect. Now off you go children." Said the Wizard. The flames blocking the exit disappear.

Cowardly Lion ran straight out. Me, Scarecrow and Tin Man follow him. Apparently Scarecrow knows the way to her castle and it would be another long journey.

I groaned. Another long journey. I can't wait to get home.

* * *

Author's Note: I go back to school tomorrow. So I can't guarantee when the next chapter will be out. Or if I can even get on the computer. Oh well, things will work themselves out.  
We already have all the characters figured out: Stan is Dorothy, Sparky is Toto, Kyle is Scarecrow, Kenny is Tin Man, Cartman is Cowardly Lion, Mrs. Broflovski is the Wicked Witch of the North, Butters is her assistant, Wendy is Glenda the Good Witch, and Mr. Garrison is the Wizard. I think that's all. Tell me if it's not.


	8. Chapter 7: The Creepy Castle

Author's Note: Review from peeps! :D

kylekennypiptweek: Don't worry. Shelia earned all of Butters' grounding time. Of course I made him annoying because he annoyed me in the movie. HUGS AND COOKIES!

IChangedMyNameAgain: Yep. So far I know that 7th grade sucks. I only have classes with 3 of my friends (Not counting band) And don't worry, Shelia earns all of Butters' grounding time. HUGS AND COOKIES!

brittishlikepip: WOOP! By the way, if we ever meet somehow, I'm bringing 2,000 dollars worth of Cheesy Poofs. HUGS AND COOKIES!

Creek Grrl: Eh, at least your excuse is bad sense of direction. I was 10 minutes late for every class because I felt like goofing off in the hallway instead. Mainly because, I don't like the peeps in my classes. And thanks! HUGS AND COOKIES!

Disclaimer: I don't own South Park or Le Wizard Of Oz.

* * *

**The Wizard of Odd.**

**Chapter 7: The Creepy Castle.**

* * *

The walk to the Wicked Witch of the North's castle was quicker than I'd thought it'd be. It only took half an hour long, but seemed like ten minutes since we were goofing around the entire walk.

"What if I told you something in a manner where you and only you would understand. If you could have one thing and one thing only and some fat hobo-" This was a random story coming from Scarecrow but he stopped dead in his tracks and pointed to a black creepy looking castle up ahead. "That's it." He said. "That's the Wicked Witch's castle!"

"Oh no!" Said Cowardly Lion. "We're not actually going in their are we?"

"That's the witch's castle. You're going in their fatass." Said Tin Man.

This made CL gulp. "Oh, Jesus. I'm not doing this..."

"Come on dude. We made it this far, we aren't turning around." I say annoyed. As if Cartman weren't annoying enough, this place's version of him was even worse.

"Look, just close your eyes if you need to." Said Scarecrow.

We began walking down the trail that leads to the castle. It was foggy and dead, rotted trees surrounded the trail. The only sounds you can hear are crickets and crows. It's kinda like walking through the haunted trail when you go to a place with a bunch of haunted houses. The only difference, no one would randomly pop out. I myself was a little scared. I wonder how CL is doing. I look over at him, he's shaking like crazy hiding his eyes behind his hands.

"I'm gonna eat a penny a day, and tell you Olay Olay! Got a shark in my room, gonna marry her with her groom." Sang Tin Man, playing with the tin strings of his parka.

"What are you singing?" I asked him.

He looked at me and smirked. "I'm a doll, I'm appalled. Look at that creep, he's cuttin' in deep. Firing away, I've got to say. That Mr. Man, he's got a plan."

"Will you stop?"

"She's a rose, puts on quite a show. Look out for her, before she may prefer. Thy blew skies, with the sun in her eyes. She is gone, many reasons but one."

"STOP SINGING!"

"Me is bored, stuck doing this chore. Looking around, from all this town. Gotta see the truth, full of ruth. Please stay away, It's all I gotta say."

I punch him in the mouth. "Dude. Seriously, shut the fuck up!"

He rubbed his mouth and looked at me. "Come on, I was just playing around."

"Maybe so, but it's annoying."

Instead of saying anything else, Tin Man began to hum.

"G-guys. Can we pl-please turn around?" Asked CL.

"No. We're halfway there. Just think about something else." Says Scarecrow.

Taking his advice, CL began to hum along with Tin Man.

"That's no what I meant."

"Shut up."

More silence. I think I'm beginning to hear whispering. Might be in my head since this place is scary. Then I seen shadows in the trees. 'Calm down. It's just an optical illusion.'

Then two people jump out and grab Scarecrow. They took his arms and ran him into the woods.

"AHHH! GUYS HELP!" We heard him scream. My reflexes ran straight after him, following his screams.

I find him alone in the middle of the creepy woods and his hay needles are out of him and scattered everywhere.

"SCARECROW! What happened?" I asked.

He looked at me with sad eyes, "They took out my arms and threw them over there." He says pointing to the left. "They took out my legs and threw them over there." This time he pointed to he right.

I pick up the hay needles and restuff him. "That's horrible."

Fully stuffed, he stands up. "I know." We head out of the woods and to the others.

"Hey, what'd they do to you?" Cowardly Lion asked.

"They took out my needles and scattered them everywhere!" Scarecrow replied.

"Are you alright?" Tin Man asked.

"Yeah."

"HE HA HA HA HEEEE!" We heard crazy laughing from above. I looked up. The Wicked Witch on her broom! "Hello boys. You've come a long way if you're here. But I must tell you, your long journey must come to an end." She swoops down and grabs me. I tried getting her off me, but she flew up as high as she could, meaning I either die from falling or come with her. I was afraid to look down, we were up so high! We finally landed inside the room in the highest tower of the palace.

"BUTTERS! We have Stanley! There's three others on the trail of the castle. Send out the guards." Said the Wicked Witch of the North.

"Okay." Replied her assistant, sadness in his voice.

"YOU!" She turned to me. "I've been waiting for you for a long time!"

"Why?" I asked confused.

"YOU KNOW WHY! You killed my sister! Now. I will have my revenge. By killing YOU!" She began to laugh hysterically.

* * *

Author's Note: I'm aware. This chapter was really short. So 7th grade so far... Meh, the people annoy me, so I purposely miss ten minutes of class. And it's sweet the teachers never notice! :D The song I had Tin Man sing is a song me and my friends made up at lunch because we were bored. And the random story that was inturupted at the beginning will be used in a lot of my stories. Only in one would the full story be told. Want to know it? Just ask.

:O I got the AWESOMEST homework to do! I get to write a story for English! And it can be about whatever I want! Yea-uhh!

Well later peeps! Those in school or going to school, Good Luck! And try to learn what stuff you can and can't get away with! Then the day will be funner!


	9. Chapter 8: Will to live

Author's Note: Le reviews from peeps! :D

brittishlikepip: Yep, 200 bags just for you! Perhaps if you share those, it will help with the Le Cheesy Poof Resistance. There was no specific tune to the song, me and my friends just sang it like we were drunk people. I would, but I've already starting writing the story. HUGS AND COOKIES!

kylekennypiptweek: Same here. Which is why I purposely miss ten minutes of class. Can't wait for the day I finally get caught. Yeah, I made her the Wicked Bitch of the North for a reason, plus she also reminds me of my science teacher who I want to throw a brick at. I originally planned on calling her the Wicked Bitch, though I don't know why I didn't... too late! :/ HUGS AND COOKIES!

RESPECTMYATHORITAH: (I don't feel like calling you "Guest", that would be pointless) When I don't log in, I refer myself as "A random fat guy" (Even though I'm a girl and I'm not fat) Scarecrow was telling a random story that I told my friends, as well as the song Tin Man was singing. Inside jokes, you should know, you and MagicNinjaUnicorn do it all the time. Even though none of my friends use this website or have even heard of it. But still, it's fun to do. HUGS AND COOKIES!

Disclaimer: I don't own South Park or the Wizard of Oz. Trey Parker and Matt Stone own South Park, and I have no idea who own the Wizard of Oz.

* * *

**The Wizard of Odd.**

**Chapter 8: Will to live.**

* * *

"Wh-what? You're gonna kill me?" I ask.

"Yes! And you will die in a manner where you would suffer!" Said the Wicked Witch of the North.

Damn, this woman is nuts! And besides, maybe her sister deserved to die if she was anything like her! Why must I pay the price for doing something good? I mean, the Munchkins and Wendy were happy they no longer had to deal with the Wicked Witch of the West. Unless they're the ones who are evil. Then again, wouldn't that make Scarecrow, Tin Man and Cowardly Lion evil too? Obviously they're not. But what if they are? What if they were sent from Wendy to put on a big act, resulting me to die in the end. Wait a minute. Why am I thinking this? The Wicked Witch is trying to kill me!

As if tired of waiting for me to respond, the Wicked Witch pulled out an hourglass. "This here hourglass represents the amount of time you have to live." She explained. "Once the last little grain of sand hits the other side, you're dead, just like my sister." She set the hourglass on a table. "You have ten minutes of life left, which you will spend alone in this room. I hope you enjoyed living for the time being." She laughed her crazy laugh and left the room.

"Oh my god." I say quietly to myself. "I only have ten minutes to live." I slumped down to the side of the wall and cry. I don't care if anyone can see me, which they can't anyway, if you knew you only had ten minutes to live, you'd be pretty upset too.

"S-Stanley? Are you okay? How is the w-witch getting her revenge?" Asked a familiar voice. It took me a few seconds to realize it was her assistant, Butters.

I look up at him, he's standing there, rubbing his knuckles together nervously. "She gave me ten minutes to live." I reply, more to myself than him.

"Really? Gee, Stanley, that's awful... What if I tell you, there's a way you can s-stay alive and free thousands of people from misery?" The assistant asked.

"Why are you helping me? I thought you were on the Wicked Witch's side."

"Well, uh, I don't like her. At all, so I figure, only you can destroy her. Please!"

"How would this help me not die?"

"The hourglass," he said pointing to my cause of death. "It's ran by her magic, if she's dead, her magic wears off and so would the effect of the hourglass."

I get up to my feet. "Are you sure?"

"Yes sir! I don't like lyin' to people, when I do, I get grounded."

"okay. But, what do I do?"

"Your friends are in the main hallway being escorted by guards. I'll take you there."

Before I could ask any further questions, Butters grabbed my hand and pulled me out of the room. Walking me down a really long flight of stairs and into a room with people who are wearing the same outfit. "The guards escorting your friends" he had told me.

8 more minutes till death, this better work Butters!

"Stop! What are you doing with this man?" A guard asked Butters.

"Oh, uh, The witch asked me to bring him to her, along with all his friends." Butters lied. I guess he's gonna be grounded.

"Really? We were given word that these three go to the castle prison." Castle prison? You mean a dungeon sir?

"The witch changed her mind and wants to deal with them personally first."

"You're lying."

"No I'm not, I get grounded when I lie."

"Fine, but if you're lying, good luck buddy." The guard gave a simple command of releasing my friends, which was done. My friends ran straight towards me.

"STAN!" Screamed Scarecrow giving me a hug.

"DUDE!" Said tin Man.

Cowardly Lion just stayed quiet, GOOD!

"You fellas need to get out of here, Stanley will kill off the Wicked Witch. Now go! He's only got 8 minutes to live." Said Butters to my friends.

"Seven minutes." I corrected him.

"HURRY!"

"No." Said Scarecrow. "I'm going with him."

"Me too!" Said Tin Man.

"Me four" Said CL.

"Alright. But you fellas be careful before-"

"HA HEHEHE HA!" The Wicked Witch's laughing was heard behind us. We all turn around and see her.

"Butters, now what do you think you're doing helping the bad guys out?" She asked.

"They aren't bad! They're nice! Unlike you! You enjoy watching everyone suffer and you're proud to be the Wicked Bitch of the North!" Butters replied.

The witch frowned. "Sweetie are you okay? Do you need timeout?"

"Maybe i do. Better than staring at your ugly face!" This comment resulted in the witch smacking him.

"I'll show you ugly faced you little smartass! GUARDS! PUT THE ASSISTANT IN THE PRISON!" A couple guards grab his arms.

"Now, you!" The Wicked Witch turned to us. "Looks like you no longer have any allies. And Stanley you now only have 6 minutes to live. No, let's shorten it to one." Another hourglass came from her black robe. One with very little gains of sand in it. "And as for you three, GUARDS ESCORT THESE THREE TO THE PRISON!" My friends had their arms grabbed by different guards.

"Please, Mrs. Wicked Witch, let my friends go, it's me you want. And you almost have your revenge in 30 seconds. Please let them go." I beg. The last thing I want is for the only friends I have made in this place to suffer the consequences of knowing me.

"Fine." Said the witch. "BUT THEIR BELONGINGS SHALL BE TAKEN AWAY FROM THEM!" She sent a signal to the guards to check my friends' clothing for any sentimental value within them.

"Ten seconds Stanley." I gulped.

"Goodbye you guys. I'll miss you all very dearly. I promise, I'll be looking down on you in Heaven. Or up in Hell." I say to my three friends.

"Goodbye Stan." Said Scarecrow.

"Bye dude. I'll miss you." Said TM.

CL didn't say anything he just broke out in tears.

"5...4...3...2..." I counted down.

"UGH! WHAT IS THIS FILTH? THIS CAME FROM ONE OF THE BOYS? THIS IS NOT ACCEPTABLE! IT... IT... KILLS!" The witch screamed.

I look at her, she's holding a pile of Playboy magazines in hand. The most disgusted look on her face, then she begins melting. I'm being totally cereal! The bitch is melting!

"I'm melting! I'm melting! NOOO!" She was screaming. When she fully melted the screams stopped, and I realized something.

I'm still alive. Butters was right, when she died, her magic wore off.

* * *

Author's Note: Instead of water melting the witch and saving everyone, it was Kenny's porno magazines that were taken away from him. I've had the idea of this being how she dies since I started writing the story. And it works perfectly because Shelia really is a strict person who would do anything to keep children away from bad things. Remember, she started a war with Canada over a movie!

Next chapter will be updated when I next use a computer. Which would probably be a while, or tomorrow. It's easier for me to have access to reading stories than writing stories, because you can read and review peeps stories on a DSi, but you can't write stories, if you could then I'd be updating everyday instead of every other day.

Well, bye peeps! I love you all dearly! :D


	10. Chapter 9: You killed the Wicked Witch!

Author's Note: REVIEWS!

RESPECTMYATHORITHAH: Yeah, I think you should leave it as that. XD I think there is this chapter, then the next one is the last. I may be wrong, depends on what my brain lets me write. HUGS AND COOKIES!

kylekennypiptweek: I have yet to learn what platonically means and I'm too lazy to look it up. Yep, bitch is dead. Porn killed her. I've thought of that being the way she died since I started writing this. HUGS AND COOKIES!

Cheetah: Your review? Was it about the story or yourself? I've seen the overly attached girlfriend video on YouTube. Damn girl is scary. And I'm amazed a cheetah can breakdance. Actually, I'm amazed a cheetah used a computer, read a story, and wrote in perfect complete sentences a review. hugs and cookies.

brittishlikepip: No, we're only bastards if we kill Kenny. I seen what you did to spread La Cheesy Poof Resistance awareness. HUGS AND COOKIES!

Disclaimer: I don't own South Park or The Wizard Of Oz. Trey and Matt own SP I don't know who own Wizard of Oz.

* * *

**The Wizard of Odd.**

**Chapter 9: You killed the Wicked Witch!**

* * *

"You! You killed the Wicked Witch!" Said a guard.

Did he sound angry? "I'm sorry I didn't mean to I just-"

The guard cut me off. "No need to apologize. I just want you to realize what you've done."

"Look, I'm really sorry."

"Why are you sorry?" Another guard asked.

"Yeah, you've just freed us from the Wicked Witch of the North!" Said another.

"We are free at long last!" Another guard cried.

"Praise the boys who have freed us. Praise the Tin one's magazines!" All the guards were cheering us on, exclaiming how happy they were the Wicked Witch was finally dead.

Tin Man walks over to the melted witch and takes his magazines.

"Dude, you look at that?" I asked him.

He nodded awkwardly as he put the magazines in his parka.

"Fellas! You did it!" I heard Butters shout in the crowd of guards. He comes running out of the crowd and gives us each a hug. "I knew you could do it!"

"Um, thanks Butters. Can we please go back to the Emerald Palace? I want to go home now." I say.

"Oh, sure. I just wanted to thank ya is all."

"Wow, I can't believe it. I'm so close to getting courage." Said Cowardly Lion. Hmph, typical. Even as a coward he's selfish.

"Well, there's a shortcut to leaving this place. Instead of taking the trail in front of the castle, go through the backdoor and walk through the cornfield. You should be right at the palace."

"Right thanks."

"Stan! Don't forget we need the Wicked Witch's broomstick!" Scarecrow reminded.

"Oh yeah, go get it, I'm just gonna start walking." I say walking to where the back door was supposed to be. Tin Man and Cowardly Lion followed. Scarecrow grabbed the broomstick from the melted witch and ran after us.

"So we're going to walk through a cornfield. You okay with that?" Tin Man asked Cowardly Lion. More teasing him than asking.

"Yeah, Yeah, sure. Let's just, get this over with." CL replied.

We reach the backdoor of the castle, open it, see the cornfield, and begin walking through it.

"How many long journeys have we had so far?" Scarecrow asked.

"Well, there was the journey to the palace, the journey to the Wizard's room, the journey to the Wicked Witch's castle and now this one. So... 4?" I say.

Scarecrow nodded. "After I get my brain, I'm going to take a long nap."

"Me too."

* * *

Author's Note: This chapter was EXTREMELY short and pointless. But, I just want to get a couple things out before you move along.

1: PLEASE READ THIS! Me and brittishlikepip have started a campaign called "La Cheesy Poof Resistance." It is a group that only has four members so far. Basically the point of it is that we want Cheese Puffs to be known as Cheesy Poofs.

2: REALLY IMPORTANT TO READERS! I'm wondering what you peeps would want me to do for my next story, I'm either going to do another parody, where Tweek is the main character, OR an original story of mine that will be a Creek story.

That is all. Bye peeps! Love you all so very dearly! :D


	11. Chapter 10: The end

Author's Note: Le reviews from peeps! :D

RESPECTMAYATHORITAH: SWEET! Another La Cheesy Poof Resistance member! By the way, You are an awesome peep! And you remind me so much of myself... It's creepy. Oh well, talking to ya is just epic! XD HUGS AND COOKIES!

IChangedMyNameAgain: Don't be disappointed, it's okay. Yes, you can be in La Cheesy Poof Resistance! WOOH Another member! And thanks! HUGS AND COOKIES!

SouthParkFan99: Oh yeah! A review from a new peep. 3 actually... Um, What was I talking about? XD HUGS AND COOKIES!

kylekennypiptweek: Thanks for being my dictionary! :D So, does that mean your going to join? Yeah, unfortunately this is the last chap, but it will be long. HUGS AND COOKIES!

brittishlikepip: Yep, Bitch is dead, Guards are free! Woop! And we got some new members coming along on le campaign! YEAH! HUGS AND COOKIES!

MarshieMello-Cookies: AWESOME NAME! O.o Another peep wants to join our campaign! WOOP! I'll tell you at the end of chapter. HUGS AND COOKIES!

Disclaimer: I don't own South Park or the Wizard of Oz. Trey Parker and Matt Stone own South Park, and I have no idea who own the Wizard of Oz.

* * *

**The Wizard of Odd.**

**Chapter 10: The end! (That's what i'm calling the last chapter of all my stories.)**

* * *

Timeless journeys. They sure have been annoying, but they were probably one of the funnest things I've done in a while. Keywords: In a while, meaning since I left South Park. We've managed to make it out of the cornfield. So now we stand at the front door of the Emerald Palace once again.

I knock on the door, the man opened the middle circle. "Hello, welcome to the Emerald Palace. The Wizard is not seeing any clients today, so you wasted your time coming here. Please come back tomorrow."

"Actually, we were here earlier." I tell him.

"Yeah." Scarecrow adds. "We have the Wicked Witch of the North's broomstick for the Wizard." He holds up the broomstick, it has little pieces of cornstalk stuck to it from the cornfield.

"Oh you were? Well come on in!" He opened up the front door and allowed us to walk inside.

As we walked in, I noticed that the workers within the palace were staring at us.

"Welcome back." One worker said to us casually.

"Thanks." We all mumble, walking the extremely long walk to the Wizard's room.

"Well, if it's a ten minute walk we should at least talk about something." Tin Man says.

"Like what?" Cowardly Lion asks.

"I dunno, what do you guys wanna talk about?"

"Well, how was everyone's adventure so far?" Scarecrow asks.

"Eh, it was fun." Said Tin Man.

"Creepy as hell." Said Cowardly Lion.

"Annoying." I answer.

"Tin Man, average answer, Cowardly Lion, typical," Scarecrow summed up aloud. "Stan, why?"

"For every reason possible." I reply.

"Are we one of those reasons?" CL asked.

"No, well you are. But no."

"Where's your dog?" Scarecrow asked me.

I stopped walking. "Did Sparky come with us to the Wicked Witch's castle?" I ask them.

"I don't think so."

"He might still be in the Wizard's room." Tin Man said.

I began to walk with them again. "I hope you're right."

The rest of the walk was silent, but not that long. Finally, we reach the door to the Wizard's room.

"You got anything to be afraid of?" I ask Cowardly Lion.

"No sir!" He says.

"Great, now come on." I open the door, sure enough, Sparky's in there.

"WHO DARES DISTURB THE WIZARD!" The Mr. Garrison sounding voice asked.

"It's us again." Says Tin Man.

"We have retrieved the Wicked Witch's broomstick." Said Scarecrow.

"Really? You have? Well, um, YOU STILL DON'T GET YOUR WISHES!" Said the Wizard.

"Why? We did everything you asked us to do!" I whine.

"I know, but I just don't like you guys. I'm the Wizard! Everyone must do as I say. Or else I-"

At this moment, Sparky ran towards a curtain on the right side of the room. He pulls it open with his mouth, revealing a man who looked like Mr. Garrison with a microphone.

"Please ignore the man in the curtain. He's my flame assistant." The Wizard lied.

"We're not stupid. We know it's you talking." Said Cowardly Lion.

The Wizard sighed. "Okay, I'm the Wizard. I don't actually have magic powers. I'm sorry."

"You lied to us for power?" Scarecrow asked. "You are a terrible person!"

"Yes, I know. I'm sorry." He replied.

"Well, I did all this for no reason!" I shout. I'm totally pissed that this was all just a scam. "I WANT TO GO HOME!"

"Okay, please settle down Stanley." Said the Wizard nervously.

"NO!" I yell.

"I wanted a heart!" Whined Tin Man.

"AND I NEED MAH COURAGE!" Shouted Cowardly Lion.

"And I could really use a brain." Said Scarecrow.

"Okay! Okay! Please! I don't have what you want, but I can give you an alternative." The Wizard assured us.

"An alternative?" I ask.

"Yes, wait right here!" He goes back behind the curtain and returns with a bag full of stuff.

"What's all that for?"

"Okay, we'll start with Scarecrow." He said ignoring my question. "You want a brain right? Why?"

"Because I want people to know of my great knowledge." Said Scarecrow.

"Well, I can't give you a brain, but I can make you part of Central Intelligence Service's knowledge position." The Wizard told him.

"Central Intelligence Services?" Scarecrow asked.

"It is a group that only accepts the smartest of people. You, are accepted for your great intellect. You don't need a brain."

"Wow. I'm part of Central Intelligence Services."

"And now, you Tin Man," Said the Wizard moving on to Tin Man. "You want a heart. Why?"

"To feel more human." Tin Man replied.

"What if I give you this?" The Wizard reaches into the bag. He pulls out a big red heart shaped box and hands it to him.

"What's this?"

"Put it on the left side of your chest, you know, where the heart is."

Tin Man obeyed the Wizard's order and placed it in the left side of his tin parka.

"It beats! The box beats!" He looked a big too happy.

"And you, Cowardly Lion, you need courage." Said the Wizard. "I know a group that can help you get some."

"Really?" The lion asked excitedly.

"Yes. It's known as La Cheesy Poof Resistance." He replied. "Trust me, you'll love it."

"La Cheesy Poof Resistance huh? Sweet."

"Well, you boys got your wishes. Are you happy now?"

"What about me?" I asked. "You didn't grant my wish."

The Wizard turned to me and smiled. "Stanley, you didn't get your wish? I'll fix that."

"There's an alternative to getting home?"

"Not an alternative. I myself am from South Park, Colorado. I have a hot air balloon outside that will leave to that destination whenever I want." Said the Wizard.

"Really?"

"Yes, I will go back to South Park now, and you can come with me!"

"FINALLY!" I exclaim. "But, if you're from South Park, does that mean you're Mr. Garrison?"

"Yeah, I wanted to see how long it would take you to figure that out R-tard."

"When do we go on the balloon?"

"Right now if you want."

"Okay." I go pick up Sparky.

"Good, your friends can come along with us and watch us take off." Mr. Garrison told me as he began walking out of the room.

I follow him and signal the others to come with us. They follow as well. The walk was really quiet, but Mr. Garrison kept humming this one song to himself that sounded kinda like "Fag, fag, shitty, shitty, fag, fag" The same song he sung when the word "shit" was going to be said on television. The people said it 164 times during that time.

The Wizard leads us through 5 hallways of the palace and through a kitchen. Then we reach his hot air balloon, which is surrounded by palace workers and Munchkins.

"Fellow people of this weird place! I am the Wizard." Mr. Garrison announced to the "audience". "I'm leaving this place to go home, forever. It's been nice knowing you all, but I'm going home now." He then climbs into the hot air balloon. "Stanley say bye to your little friends so we can go home."

I turn to Cowardly Lion. "Good luck with getting your courage."

"Thanks, have fun being in South Park." He replied.

I then turn to Tin Man. "I'll miss you a lot dude. You were pretty cool."

"Thanks, you were great too." He waves goodbye to me.

Then I turn to Scarecrow. "And I'll miss you the most Scarecrow."

"I'll never forget you dude." He replied.

I smile and walk into the hot air ballon with Mr. Garrison. "GOOD BYE GUYS!"

The balloon starts going up into the air, but Sparky jumps out of my arms and towards a squirrel on the ground. I jump out after him, there's no way I'm going without Sparky. I ran towards my dog and pick him up.

"HEY STUPID! YOU JUMPED OUT OF THE BALLOON! NOW YOU'RE NEVER GETTING HOME!" Mr. Garrison screamed at me from the balloon.

Fuck. Too late now. I'll be here forever... sigh.

"Well Stan, if you're going to be here. We can at least make the best of it." Said Scarecrow.

I sighed. "Yeah, I guess." I really just want to go home. DAMN IT SPARKY!

Just then, a pink bubble from the sky floats to me and pops, Wendy.

"Hello Stan." She says.

"Hi Wendy."

"You really want to go home, don't you?"

"Yeah, but i just lost the only way home."

She smiled. "No you didn't."

I give her a confused look. "There's another way home?"

"Sure! Remember the ruby slippers I told you to keep on?" She asked.

I nod. "What about them?"

Her smile grew even bigger. "If you tap together three times, and say 'There's no place like home.' It will take you home."

"Really? That's all I had to do, THIS WHOLE TIME?"

Wendy frowned. "Didn't you have fun?"

"Well, I guess i did."

"There you go! Plus you have something to always remember!"

"Whatever." I tap the ruby slippers together three times.

"Close your eyes."

I close them. "There's no place like home, there's no place like home..." My vision began to turn white.

* * *

"There's no place like home!" I say. I shot up from a hospital bed. My head hurting like a bitch.

"What?" A voice asked. I look around where I am. I'm in a hospital room and my friends and some doctors were in it. I realize the voice belonged to Kyle.

"Dude, the fuck are you talking about?" Cartman asked me. YES! HE'S NO LONGER A COWARD!

"Nothing." I say. "Just had a really weird dream. Why does my head hurt?"

"In the tornado glass cut the back of your neck, you lost a lot of blood." Said Kenny.

"Really? Sucks. I wanna go home now." I reply. I laugh at myself, still asking to go home.

"What's so funny?" Asked Kyle.

"Nothing."

"We're going to the movies, wanna come?"

"Sure." I climb out of the bed.

The door to my hospital room opens, in comes Mr. Garrison.

"Hey Stanley. How's your head?" He asked me.

"Hurts."

"Well Stan, there's something you must know."

I look at him weird. "What?"

"The whole Emerald Palace thing, it wasn't a dream."

* * *

Author's Note: THAT'S ALL PEEPS! Story is over! :( It was a great run, but all stories have to end eventually.

1: For readers: My next story will be out soon. It's called "Tweek in Wonderland" It's an Alice in Wonderland Parody! :D

2: LA CHEESY POOF RESISTANCE! Me and brittishlikepip have created a campaign where we want "Cheese puffs" to be "Cheesy Poofs" Those who want to be part of it, we have made a community where you can join! It's called, of course "La Cheesy Poof Resistance." It's picture is a bag of Cheesy Poofs. Also, we have something on our profiles that show what you can do to help spread awareness. :D Any questions or whatever, please ask either me or brittishlikepip! Thank you!


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